Blogging Around

Nikki's Dialectics: The Matrix Is and Isn't Possible

Nikki's excellently written blog post discusses reasons why the Matrix, the actual entity, the is and isn't probable. She also gets down on a very metacognitive level and hypothesizes about what about our "reality" might actually change, if anything at all, if we were living in the Matrix. Lastly, she also discusses an important theme that was mentioned in the follow-up essays on The Matrix which we read: the difference between impossibility and improbability--the only two words which we can use to make claims about something with an existence that we question and that has potential to live inside and outside of our minds.

Nikki,
I would first like to compliment you on how well you encapsulated what we did in class and secondly on how well you articulated some of the things we couldn't quite make the reach as a class to propose. Well done!

In response to the way in which you thought about the Matrix outside of our class discussion, especially when contemplating the possibility and probability of its existence, I completely agree. Since viewing the movie, I have thought about the implications which such an entity would have both on the world around me and myself. Your thoughts about how it would affect memory are a good summation of how it would impact our existence:--it wouldn't really because that's all we ever really would have known.

There was one sentence from your blog that really struck me and really got to the root of how vulnerable we really are and how the Matrix is designed to capitalize on those weaknesses. Here it is:
"We all put so much trust into our memories and experiences, fully believing in everything, that it would be almost impossible for us to turn around and realize that no, it wasn't real." Yes. That's exactly right! It's correct in the sense that it rationalizes the existence of such a thing we know as the Matrix, playing off of our paranoia after seeing the movie, but it is also a really good lesson for us. It's important for us to confide in our memory because I feel that it often keeps me sane in times of distress, but we also need to know when to step back into the present and open our mind to what's around us (be careful!) so as not to become so ingrained in our patterns--what the Matrix thrives off of.
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David's Metacognition: The Jane Eyre Mashup

In this blog, David thinks back on his group's mashup, hence "metacognition." More importantly, he recognized the dynamics of the group's thinking and didn't hesitate to note the group's shortcomings. Having been in many groups, I know how easy it is to want to blame the other members of the group for something that didn't turn about as well as you might have hoped or for something that didn't go according to planned. What was extremely mature, and sincere, might I add, was that David was able to examine his own struggles with this project and look at how it affected his group rather than bashing his group. Like I said, very mature.

David,

A you may get the sense from the introduction above, I am very impressed with you. However, I do think that it's is important for you to cut yourself a little bit of slack. While reading, I felt you react very strongly to your own ability to get a bit distracted while doing this assignment. I wouldn't get too worried or concerned about it if I were you because I think we all had similar issues. Also, the fact that this deceptively difficult assignment is trying to converge, like you said, 50+ often diverging elements doesn't make it any easier!

Another important topic which you mentioned was the plateauing of your and your group members' work ethic. Again, I think everybody experienced that to varying degrees throughout the course of this project. However, when I wanted to call it quits on this project at certain points, I came to find that an answer to the problem with the mashup, or my thinking, that I was trying to solve was often just around the corner, much to my surprise. My only advice is hang in there! because I think that you would have been surprised by what you might have found, too.

I am glad that this assignment gave you an opportunity to delve into the dynamics of your thinking and truly analyze how it works. I think the lessons you have learned will serve you very well in almost anything you have to work hard for in the future and I wish you all the very best.

Nice job, David.

Dialectics: The Matrix--Control and Submission

When I think about The Matrix and the following discussion in class, all I can think about is how turned around I felt and feel when I try and contemplate what it's trying to tell me. I hate it because I know that's exactly what it is trying to make me feel. So it's controlling me, even though thinking about the Matrix itself and acknowledging parallels to my life should be liberating, right? In other words, I think why I get so lost is because this movie thrives and can only exist on paradoxes/theses and antitheses/dialectics.

Here's the claim for you: escaping the Matrix's control, which was the equivalent of achieving freedom and autonomy, was only possible if he allowed himself to be controlled by figures and laws of the non-Matrix world. Essentially, I am stating that in order to escape the control of one captor, whether it be person or thing, we must submit ourselves to the control of another, so we are never truly free or autonomous--even if the captor which we choose to submit ourself to is much better than the initial captor.

One classic example of this is the "red or blue pill" decision. I believe that this is one of the only points in the movie when Neo has freedom and isn't subjected to anyone's authority. Due to human curiosity, he made the only decision that could be made. And, as a result, I believe that he still had the illusion of freedom when he worked under Morpheus, but was still controlled by the rules that Morpheus put in place for him, the general boundaries that the non-Matrix world posed for those living in it, and (to some extent) the prophecy that the oracle made for him. Looking at the facts, I determined, and I could very well be wrong in this, that the only way to free oneself and experience autonomy--or rather live in the space between two controlling worlds--was to do what Cypher did and determine his own fate. By no means is this the right call, but all I'm saying is that he recognized that after he left the Matrix, he was being controlled by another world. So, he basically took the red and blue pill--allowing him to see how far down the rabbit hole went while also being able to enjoy the illusion of a juicy Porterhouse.

I know--confusing, right?

Another example of this is what the Oracle has to offer. Despite Neo verbalizing how much he dislikes the idea of fate, he still ends up going to visit it's human embodiment (thanks to Morpheus). Before, Neo had allowed himself to be controlled by ignorance and, according to the oracle, believing incorrectly that he could be "the one" with out any validation for that claim. By visiting the oracle, he submits himself yet again to the control of an opposite world; he knowingly submitted himself to the control of the oracle, a world where he thought he would be entirely informed on his status as "the one." The funny part is that in this case, besides needing to hear what he did hear from the oracle, he was almost entirely free despite the illusion of control. Dialectics, everyone...

Translating this to pre-2199 times, the world in which we live today, we need to keep in mind what we buy into and how that compares or contorts to what we choose to submit ourselves to in the future. We need to ask ourselves: is this liberating or are there unforeseen boundaries that will confine me and even cap my right to govern myself? The line between the control of two opposing worlds is so fine in the Matrix, so I suppose it is the same way in our world, that it is nearly nonexistent. The Matrix is all about experiencing two worlds and using that experience to create a space for oneself on that incredibly fine line we know as freedom. There's more space than we realize, so we better start experiencing.

Metacognition: The Jane Eyre Mashup

In all honesty, this was a step out of bounds for me. I think that's why I enjoyed doing this project, and all of the work that went into it, so much. I think that this project, actually, was just what I needed to renew my focus and get me thinking creatively--something I'm not incredibly good at usually.

Right off the bat, I can tell that I have started to learn from my mistakes that I have made in English as well as other classes this year. For example, I reviewed example mashups from students last year one day and allowed the concepts, aestheticism and methods of delivery of those projects to sink in for a day. I think, like the reporter for the New Yorker, reviewing exemplary works permitted me to get in the mood of working on this mashup. I felt more ready to begin this project than I ever had.

By no means was the entire process as simple or painless as that first step, but I eventually came to the conclusion that in taking that first step, (Kali and) I made the project a lot simpler and much less painful than it otherwise would have been.

This was all during the time when I thought: 1) I was a solo act and 2) Believed I was working on one theme while I ended up working on another entirely different theme when I conferred with my new partner. Having what I felt like was a solid background and feeling like I was "ahead of the curve" on this assignment, however, made me much more flexible when these big, sudden changes occurred.

As we really started to venture into the thick of things, so to say, I found that it was quite difficult. I also thought to myself throughout the project, especially while searching for evidence from Jane Eyre and other works which we have reviewed in English this year, that just because there was an additional person with whom I was collaborating didn't necessarily mean that there was more evidence to be found. Despite how whiny that sounds, I am glad, in retrospect, that I had to find more of these kinds of elements. I say so because I think it pushed me to delve further into Jane Eyre itself. More importantly, though, I strongly believe that doing so got me to take a fresh look at old work and material and allowed me to connect it back to Charlotte Bronte's work, thus allowing me to understand her work better and perceive the connections it has with what's going on today with greater depth.

Lastly, the composition of the project was an important aspect of the deeper understanding which the mashup was supposed to facilitate. I have always known that work that I can do which involves more of a stream-of-consciousness style is my best work. I'm not sure how Kali felt, but I was really excited by how the text and media depicted how I thought about the book and how it's organization opened the door for the readers and even me, a collaborator in the project's formation, to weave moments and ideas in the book together. While it's difficult to articulate, what matter is that it happens.

If I had the opportunity to change something, it would most likely be figuring out what theme we were going to work with sooner. Despite our resilience and ability to start working on our new project right away, I think time spent on the initial topic could have been used valuably toward our final composition and given us less of a panic/need to scramble as the deadline approached.

Kali--
I really don't think I could have asked for a bettter partner for this project. It really helped having someone to bounce ideas off of and have different perspective. Your creativity was amazing to watch in action. More importantly, your work ethic throughout this entire project was amazing:--as someone who has worked with others who don't work with nearly the same quality or care, I was extremely impressed and lucky to collaborate with you. Thank you.

Metacognition: Short Story Process

Whenever we decide to commence an intellectual journey--trying to achieve something that so many before us have done so well--besides a sense of challenge and a little bit of excitement, we--or I for certain--have a tendency to feel slightly overwhelmed. Embarking on the adventure of writing my short story, or the preliminary drafts of it at least, was no different.

In a previous blog, I imagined what if I could tell a story well?  I was unaware that the opportunity for me to make an attempt would reveal itself so soon. With that being said, when we first got this assignment, I was really excited that I would be able to write in an expressive fashion and really hone my ability to tell a story that might actually interest people.

I never imagined myself as being so bad at it.

I say that with a smile on my face because even though I'm still trying to get the hang of it, I do really love this kind of expression, even when I'm reading it and especially while I'm writing it. I deeply believe that it opens up doors in our mind and allows us to explore a part of ourselves that is seldom explored and share it with others in a riveting and resonating way.

The subject of resonance brings me to improvements that could have been made during or considered before the writing process. I connect this to resonance because initially, I used an image that resonated with me and tried to construct a story around it. I was mistaken and realized such when I couldn't even figure out what the middle--nevertheless the end--of my story would be. What I needed to do, and what I am currently attempting to do, is build images and description around a series of events, otherwise known as a story, that resonates with me for much more time than just an image. While attempting the latter method of writing a short story, I realized that there was much more opportunity for risks that would be rewarded with what I like to call "Yes! moments" as a writer when an element of the story clicked. While I am still waiting for the payoff, I am much more confident that it will come using resonant events or occurrences/events as opposed to a single resonant image and trying to construct an entire story around it. Although Jane Eyre is by no means a short story, I think that Charlotte Brontë's ability to really capture the reader's attention in any given chapter by putting pressure on Jane and giving the reader access to all of the ensuing internal dialogue is a great example of how short story writers can capture their reader's attention.

Not so much a criticism as it is an observation, I now recall thinking about my short story in moments when I wasn't writing far more than almost any other piece in the past. While it is still far from finished, I believe this connects back to the resonant series of events that I originally pictured and used for my story. Despite the story's overall tragedy, or maybe because of their overall tragedy, I found that my mind--in free moments--sometimes just went immediately to my story and considering how I should fill in those details. I like this a lot because it's an assignment that really gets me thinking without sitting down to just do the assignment and allows me get creative. Each of these are rare things on their own. But getting both of these benefits out of one assignment? Unprecedented!

As I keep repeating, the process is not yet complete. However, I'm already seeing some of the really cool effects such an adventure has on the mind. With a few improvements, I think that this can be one of my best pieces yet, and my favorite too.

Change of Mind: The Love Story

We have only briefly touched on the vast subject of what it means to be in love in English class, hence why I am looking to explore this idea further. in class, Actually, I would like to take a moment to try and partner what we have learned about love with our study of how to put pressure on our main characters in short stories. I wish to delve further into these two concepts because I think the way my thinking about the two separately has altered the way I view the two together--love stories--differently.

No matter who you are, it's hard not to be a sucker for love stories on some level, whether we want to laugh at how corny they are or cry when we get caught up in the sappiness of it all. Admittedly, I've done both.

However, I now realize that I was a sucker for the love, but not really the story. Do you know what I mean? If we have enough emotional intelligence, we can be touched and even feel like we're living vicariously through the characters while not realizing that there isn't really more than a camera, a couple of characters and a non-spontaneous script.

I guess the ones we cry at, though are the ones that aren't as cliche as we might've expected. I think that this can be attributed to something we discussed in our short story reading and writing--the concept of pressure being put on the main character(s). In the cases of quality love story books or movies (if you believe such things exist), the break-up doesn't qualify as the pressuring and pressing situation; it reaches far deeper into-- and hits home much harder for--the audience.

I am thinking right now about the movie Once which we recently finished viewing in class. Not only does it have an entirely realistic feel to it, but there are elements of the story, such as the female lead being in an unhappy, long-distance marriage, that makes it a variation on the classic "boy meets girl plot" which I think we can all agree we believe is now almost completely exhausted.

The way I thought about love, or rather the way society's perceptions pf it have been demonstrated to me, is that it often comes wrapped in a bow and is always meant-to-be. On the contrary, I only believed love-at-first-sight to exist in very rare cases. What I'm trying to say is that after watching this movie, I have truly learned of love's imperfections and the sting that can accompany such a strong and irresistible attraction between two people. In combination with the "love" aspect of my thoughts, I learned (not just through Once) that the pressure placed on the main characters usually only strengthens the bond. This is why it will now irk me to sit through films or read books where the love between two strengthens without having serious pressure put on the main characters because, quite circularly, there is almost no other way the "L"-word, in its emotional sense, can be strengthened.

Despite the fictitious nature of the movie we watched and some of the stories which we have examined, I think it's safe to say that they have, in a sense, grounded me and my perceptions about such complex topics as love. When I get there, the formative time where I fall in love with someone in the future, the insights of love from Once and the lessons about pressure being a necessity from our short story study will not be forgotten.

What If: I could tell My Story like Marlow did his?

First things first, I know I'm barking up a confusing, potentially intellectually dangerous, and possibly impossible tree, so please, just bear with me. Thank you...

What if I told my life's story like Marlow? My first thought is that I would break it up into some smaller paragraphs; I've never realized before realized how big of a favor the use of more than one or two indents per page the author did for me. But that's besides the point.

Struggles and Aspirations
For most of my life I've been telling stories. As my friends can tell you, and judging by the quality I feel like I express my ideas in class (and even sometimes in writing), I often do a less than stellar job of telling them. Be that as it may, if there was one story which I really wanted to come out the way it sounded in my head, in a way that I knew people would be interested, I know I would want that story to be my story. Obviously, everybody has their own unique story with which they choose to share (or not) with those who they interact with (or don't share, for that matter). But what I've come to realize is that not all people who I think are interesting have an oncredibly riventing story to tell, but the way they tell it can and often does make me want to hear what they have to say. I think about Conrad telling his story in Heart of Darkness via Marlow because he does exactly what I aspire to do (well, besides the paragraphing)--holding the reader's attention by dropping subtle hints through seemingly meaningless details that end up describing an important and noteworthy lesson that makes them crave words off my pages until the the very last page. Yes, I just admitted my jealousy for Conrad and Marlow.

Function
Not only did I understand what I hope to achieve in telling my story, but I also discovered along the way what the power of a story has. One's story is like a projection, or a window distinguishing oneself from the judgemental and belittling world around them. In fact, people liking you for "who you really are" is largely tied up in your ability to tell a riveting and multi-layered story, which is always unfolding, might I add.

Toolbox
We have recently been discussing in class the essential roles which multiplicity, irony, and ambiguity play in Heart of Darkness--elements that a well relayed story absolutely requires. Something I've been trying to work on is trying to get people to realize and distinguish between the surface level and the more intellectual level of my story without saying it outright or making it inherently obvious that that is the message which I am trying to convey. This is the job of irony. In other words, I seek to drop multiple breadcrumbs rather than full-on pave a path more my listeners. On ambiguity, we should strive not to make our stories incomprehensible sophisticated or perplexing, but complicated enough, while maintaining our voice, to make them work to understand what it is we are really trying to say. Both of the above things are things we as storytellers can do on our own. However, the lt element requires the aid of other perspectives, or multiplicity. I very much enjoyed the way Conrad layered in subordinate narrators to remind the reader that the primary narrator, Marlow wasn't omniscient and that he was in fact human and biased in his opinions. I'm not saying we need to use the same story-writing techniques as Conrad did for Marlow, but covering multiple dimensions of the story and using this variety as a building block for what one hopes to accomplish by telling their story is something we, as fallible and biased humans like Marlow, could apply.

It's the Little Things
Lastly, I think it's important to figure out what goes into your story, because what comes out is almost completely dependent on what you put in. Your story doesn't have to consist of these life-changing events that make you sound sophisticated because in the end, it makes you sound incomplete. What I mean by this that the story worthy material may just be discussion of a good laugh, or a good cry, or a small moment that you helped someone else out. I believe this to be story worthy material because actions speak louder than the fabricated connection I see and hear between an internal shift and an "important" event.

No matter what, though, you have to have a story. Yes, a story is must. So gather round the campfire we call life and start talking. You've been quiet for too long.

Blogging Around (Revised)

I thought it would be interesting to compare my own poetry writing experience to that of my brilliant classmates and was very, very impressed and interested in what ai read in both Nonie's and Nish's Metacognition: poetry writing blogs. Just to preface things, I was particularly stunned at the very different approaches these students took in the similar situation of being "stuck" and desperate for substance, a situation I also found myself in. In conjunction with this idea, both of their strategies to overcoming the "poetic walls", as Nishanth said, demonstrated a high-level and crucial knowledge of oneself and how being able to take a step back and assess what they're missing made their poem way better than they could have imagined.

Nonie,

That was one very interesting and striking expression of your feelings about the process of your poem. There are certain elements of your post to which I can't totally relate, the cross-over to the music world or being motivated almost completely by the grade (although it is a motivator for sure), but I totally agree with the underlying message originally conveyed by your guitar teacher in seventh grade.

I think everyone in our class can relate to working hard at one thing or another. And while the "rolling around like a pig in mud" in the middle of the room while trying to write and painstakingly improve the darn thing is part of the process which I experienced as well, I wasn't as clever as you were in resetting mind and body to the mode of poetic thinking.

The Giving Tree is obviously a comfort of yours. As writers, and poets especially, we have an obligation to take risks, but just as important is our ability to build atop what we already know and something that we feel secure about, that thing being that very special book in your case. Knowing yourself as a worker and poet definitely helped you in this case because by resorting to an old but not forgotten comfort, you established an inspiration. And, although you may not have ridden that inspiration OT the end of your process, it ended up feeding your willingness to perspire throughout the actual writing of your poem--a willingness that I, and probably some of our classmates, undoubtedly could have used.

I will definitely keep in mind this simple, yet completely true message when I decide to embark on a difficult and oftentimes frustrating journey, especially in the context of my writing. Nice work!

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Nish,

Quite the analysis of the poem-writing and discovery process you have done here, much of which that I can relate my own process to. From what it sounds like, both of our poems originally lent themselves to clichés initially, a difficult and frustrating problem to overcome. We also realized that we needed to include more imagery in an effective and creative manner, but I, among many of my Academy classmates, struggled with this concept in the elementary versions of our poems. Another element our poems have in common is that we both somewhat drew from "The Fish" for its poetic techniques.


In the later paragraphs of this blog, I especially like how you discussed the issue of facing multiple walls over multiple drafts and how you eventually realized the importance of squeezing every last ounce of power out of the poetic tools you had. Like you, I experienced the same feeling of "this is the best that it can be" after my conference with Mr. Allen too, but I was particularly struck by how you approached the clearing of that hurdle in the process--by taking a walk in the forest and looking for ways to improve your poem. As I found with my poem, relating to and experiencing the poem, whether visually, like me, or physically, like you, is crucial in order to develop it further. I suppose that I was impressed by your willingness to fully throw yourself into the experience and delve headlong into the poem's meaning by experiencing the out of doors on your lonesome; I think it's what any good poet would and should do if they were "against the wall", so to speak. Recalling your poem from the reading during class, it sounds like you did end up solving many of the problems you faced during the various stages of your poem. And indeed, from a more future-oriented perspective, it sounds like you capitalized on those struggles to make not only that specific poem better, but also future poetry and most definitely other pieces of writing you construct. I tip my hat to you, sir.